Yeah, the title's THAT damn important to get it in all capital letters. Yay me. *..yeahno*

So, I've been pretty absent lately and.. well I'm only on here right now to scout out some inspiration on hairstyles via google.. (wtf, my brain is DEAD. i never need to do that.. first time for everything?)

For this it is something I have to apologize profusely to. I dove.. head in to deviantart.. Then.. ...stuff..

And if it was my all too regular illness stuff, heck, I'd probably just be around even more. This instead is a project too long of a time coming, and was supposed to be started when I got sick even again and had to miss school for weeks.

To the point, in January before I had an outbreak of illness and was absent a couple weeks I was asked by a teacher to create concepts for a children's book he's writing.

It totally escaped me until he approached me again about it. Cue the 'oh.. ..#&$#$##@('. I'mma working on it though! Trying to really crack down on myself to it. I don't have much done and what I end up doing or could do further about this, unless you directly contact me *points to contacts and notes* I probably won't be able to show off anything, since I'm.. ..not putting them on DA. The mere thought fills me with hesitation. (What, you don't read any sort of ToS?)

And even then I may not show anything off. Because see how I'm talking, now? 'show off'. Anxiety actually pounds pretty damn hard into me. Sometimes compliments on my art or things I do fill me with a drive to do even more. But lately, compliments and especially the buttering up given to me about doing concept art.. Well, the weight is sorta collapsing in on me.

(You should of heard him ramble on and on. If anything were to touch me it would have burned given how red my face was. He has collegues who work at SCAD and he was looking at my ultra crappy sketchbook traditional sketches (even MORE crappy them my digital ones) and startled rambling on how I need to get my stuff out there and how I'd be great and blah andddd blahhh and.. dude. My ego. Deflated. Does anyone who compliments me realize how many, MUCH, much better artists there are out there? I deserve no compliments. Really, man, cmon.)

So, with my caffiene pills, caffienated mints, caffienated coffee, hopefully this allnighter I'm pulling should show a little success to what I'm doing right now.

Or I crash burn and die miserable because I suck. Either or.

c'est la vie